My Circle Tighter Than A Cheerio

Usually I keep my posts pretty generic and I try not get too personal because most of the people who read this blog I know in real life. I’ve decided in the next couple of posts that there are some things that I want to get off my chest so this blog will be my sounding board. I won’t be naming actual names but if you know me close enough you’ll probably know who I’m talking about and who I’m talking to. With that said if you are offended or feel slighted by anything that I have or will write then as you probably already suspected I think that’s your problem and not mine.

“Here we go, here we go, my circle tighter than a Cheerio. People want a handle like silver spoons. People want a handle like here you go. Man the realest nigga I know is inside the mirror bro, And these fools be trippin’ like a suitcase, a shoelace. They too fake, and I’m too real, boy.” ~Big Sean

I’ve never been the type to say I have a bunch of friends. Sure I’m a pretty popular guy and a lot of people know me. The only thing this means to me is that I have a lot of acquaintances. I have a hard time letting people get close to me. Most of my relationships are surface and I’m ok with that. Why am I like this?

Loyalty is one of those things that I come to expect from people close to me. I don’t think that it’s too much to ask. Ask any of my close friends and they’ll probably tell you that I’m one of my most loyal people they know.

“Lack of loyalty is one of the major causes of failure in every walk of life” ~Napoleon Hill

I’ve learned from those close to me how fake friends can be detrimental to your well-being. Fake friends are the worst kind of enemies. I’d rather tell me you don’t fuck with me than for me to find out that you aren’t a real friend. Because I value real friendship I think fake friends can go fuck themselves.

“Fake friends are like shadows. Always near you at your brightest moments, but nowhere to be seen at your darkest hour.” ~ Unknown

It’s not by accident that I am a member of a fraternity whose motto is “Friendship is essential to the soul.” If you’re my friend I would go to the end of the earth for you. Just as much as I make a great friend I make an even worse enemy. There are people who have put their names on that list. With a that said, I’m stepping off of my soapbox and continuing to do great things with and for my real friends.

Good day and good night.


20 thoughts on “My Circle Tighter Than A Cheerio

  1. Jubilance

    I’m with you on the loyalty thing, its essential to any relationship I have, whether friendship or romantic. But loyalty can be a tricky thing depending on what angle you’re looking from & how you define it. Loyalty to oneself, ones friends, ones family all play a role & must be balanced & managed accordingly.

  2. Ms. Tee

    Tundae you hit the nail directly on the damn head with this one. I absolutely agree to every single word you typed in this blog. I have been struggling with the reality of FAKE ASS UNLOYAL friends since the end of 2009. it’s a learning lesson in life & I’ve learned to drop all of the ones who do not stand for anything, who don’t have my best interest at heart, and the ones who always support their selves and no one else. Thanks for shinning a light on all the Fakers & Ferneries that infest a lot of people’s lives. Keep on doing you for you will be better without any of them, I say. You have your brothers & family and that’s all that will matter in living & in death.

  3. Ericka

    I’ve never understood how people get these fake friends in their lives. Granted, I’m in a sorority so you get those tag a long chicks that “want to be down” but I’d never categorize them as a friend.

    Like you said, “I have a lot of acquaintances” and I know what they are from the beginning.

    I guess I eliminate all that by telling people up front I have a small core group of best friends (3). Everyone else…we’re really cool…I have love for you…wouldnt depend on you too much….thats it.

  4. Euphoric Ears

    Great post, and good point by Jubliance about balance!

    Luckily I haven’t had much of an issue w/ fake friends. That’s not to say that I haven’t had situations where I’ve had to cut people off, but in most instances…the lost wasn’t that serious.

    I know I’m a good friend, hell…generally a good person. I go above and beyond to help most people. My issue comes when my kindness or courtesy isn’t reciprocated.

    For example, for my birthday I had a private cooking class. I had to come up w/ a minimum of 10 people to be able to this. That was difficult in its self b/c I’m very particular about who I choose to celebrate with. Anywho, I invited this girl who I thought was a friend. She’s saying she’ll be there…all this stuff. I even let her slide on the $60 deposit b/c she was gonna ride w/ me.

    The day before, her BBM status is about her being sick. The next day (the day of the event) I don’t hear from her. Like, if I was really sick…I’d let the person know. I finally ask her what’s good…she gives me this whole song and dance. Says she’ll let me know if she feels better.

    Long story short, she didn’t let me know ANYTHING and on top of that my friend’s ended up coming out of pocket for (which was about $80). That Monday she BBM’s me asking me how the event went. F*ck out of here. Friends don’t do sh*t like that to friends. I haven’t spoken to her since then. No hard feelings, but also there is nothing to reconcile. She showed me loud and clear the type of friend she is, and quite frankly I don’t roll w/ people like that so…..

  5. Ms. Tee

    i agree with Euphoric Ears. I’ve been in that situation b4 with a good few of my so called friends. But to me it’s ok it’s a learning lesson for me knowing who I can rely on & who I cannot rely on.

  6. Cherise Johnson

    Right on time with this post. I was out over the weekend with a bunch of girls dancing and someone said to me..”I see ya having fun with your crew.” I responded “they aren’t my crew.” For a moment I felt bad for responding in such a way. For a long time I struggled with why I didn’t have alot of friends. I finally realized you can’t be friends with any and everybody. Nicely written Tunes.

    1. madscientist7 Post author

      you shouldn’t have felt bad at all. i hang out and party with a lot of people that aren’t my friends but close associates. i have no problem saying so.

  7. Ms. Tee

    There are party associates, drinking associates, business associates & then real freinds. We have a lot of the first three, & we gradually subtract people from real friend category the older we get. So hey it shouldn’t be no hard feelings at all. Just point out all the Real Folks, & say FUCK the Fake ones and let them watch you walk away gracefully.

  8. keishabrown

    i have been disappointed before by the disloyalty of some people in my past, i caution to not let it affect your future.
    not everyone should and will jump through hoops to prove their friendship to you. they will show it with their actions. and if they aren’t true..that will come to light soon enough..
    good post. i gotta think more on this!

  9. jouelzy

    I find that alot of people have trouble clearly defining who their friends are. Folks like their egos massaged and are very easily conned into faux friendships with “yes” people. I don’t need a friend that’s going to tell me what I like to hear, and that’s exactly what folks fall for, but rather a friend that will keep it real and pull me from the ledge. Folks don’t always get the point of that…

  10. JSin

    I can relate. I don’t befriend people easily. There are too many snakes, users and backstabbers. I like to know I can trust people before I call them a friend. It’s hard to find people who are truly loyal and have your best interest at heart. So many people are only focused on self, you know?

  11. nowsayitwithme

    Don’t get me started on loyalty. I dunno how long my shit list is but people have made their way on it. Recently too. Disappointing. Friends close & enemies closer? Ehh, don’t touch me. lol

  12. Pingback: 2011 Recap « The Native Son

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