I Am Number 4

While I was home I attended an ugly Christmas sweater party at the home of a college friend. While I chatted it up with other college friends, one of them pulled out a sheet of paper that quickly became the topic of conversation for about 30 minutes. My friend is a high school teacher and she confiscated the paper from one of her students and made a copy for her enjoyment.

The paper was a list of the top 87 things that the student hated. My friend was listed at number 4. We wondered how she could possibly be listed so high. What did she do to this boy? As a point of reference George Zimmerman was listed at number 87. Other notable listings included Ebola, ISIS and Justin Beiber, which she also outranked.

This got me thinking that instead of doing a typical year-end post of things I want to change going into the new year or reflections of things about the past year I’d follow suit and talk about things that I hate. So without further adieu here is my list of things that I hate (in order)

  1. Corrupt, abusive police officers
  2. Racist people
  3. Pretentious people
  4. Seafood
  5. J. Edgar Hoover
  6. Don Lemon
  7. George Zimmerman
  8. Los Angeles Lakers
  9. Fox News
  10. Rush Limbaugh
  11. Kobe Bryant
  12. Classism
  13. Mayonnaise
  14. Nascar
  15. John Boehner
  16. Apple chargers
  17. The number 3
  18. Dallas Cowboys
  19. Ingrown Hairs
  20. Bill O’Reily
  21. Sitting next to obese people on airplanes
  22. High waist jeans
  23. Turbulence
  24. Carlos Rodgers (of Fairmont Heights HS)
  25. PETA
  26. Michael Jordan
  27. Wet socks
  28. Ratchet TV
  29. D’Angelo
  30. Yogurt
  31. New York Yankees
  32. Skinny jeans on men
  33. Spirit airlines
  34. Gambling
  35. Contrarians
  36. Rum
  37. Gin
  38. Mohawks
  39. Reebok
  40. Woodchuck
  41. Go-Go (Judge your mother)
  42. Snapbacks
  43. Darren Wilson
  44. Bill Cosby
  45. Planes flying near Malaysia
  46. New England Patriots
  47. Fritos
  48. Duke
  49. Neck and hand tattoos
  50. When I say I hate something and someone says, “Hate is a strong word”. I now how words work and what they mean. I know I hate you.

Welcome to the Haters Ball. Let me know what you hate.


18 thoughts on “I Am Number 4

  1. gemmieboo

    good list.

    its really impressive that your friend beat ISIS, George Zimmerman, AND Justin Bieber. yikes. she must not let students say on fleek, bye felicia, thot or about a week ago – if so, i can see why she’s number 4. #FreeGreezyTho #FreeMeeshieHo #FreeBreezyHo #FreeSchmurdaYo

    1. Shaynie Mercer

      I was number 1 and 7 and various times. LOL. Before Christmas break, I was his best friend. #mentalhealthisreal

  2. Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

    Happy New Year, m*****f***ers!

    *Dials up the hate…*
    1. People who don’t have any idea as to how their government works on any level. It’s the White House not Avengers Mansion.
    2. The Raiders’ offensive coordinator, Greg Olson.
    3. Extremists of any kind
    4. Effete liberals
    5. Staunch conservatives
    6. NPR pledge drives
    7. The Denver Broncos
    8. The NRA
    9. The legislative branch of the Federal Government
    10. Punk-ass Nikki Haley
    11. Auburn Tigers football
    12. Clemson Tiger football
    13. Drake
    14. Soft-handed dudes
    15. Mayonnaise
    16. NFL regional coverage
    17. Stringer Bell
    18 Fox and MSNBC
    19. Bobby Flay’s soulless cooking
    20. Urban Radio (it is as soulless as Flay’s cooking)

    1. madscientist7 Post author

      I kinda want to take some of your list and add it to mine. mainly 1 (although i’ve been looking to some of U.S. code and PBO does have some power in what happened to protesters in ferguson), 8, 9 and 10.

      Daps on mayo. shit is just disgusting.

      1. Wu Young, Agent of M.E.

        I could have made this list really long but I didn’t want to pull an Obsidian.

        Fed’s have more power than they care to use but are afraid of setting bad precedents when dealing with the states. They had ways to flex on the folks in Missouri.

        Mayo and ranch are demon condiments.

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